Today our grandson Akira is 3 days old. His little nostrils flare at the fragrance of a flower. He is an efficient drinker of milk and his perfect limbs stretch in strange flexible asanas. He squints up at the light and smiles to strange dreams. We are his puppets on a string.
I think of the babies after World War II who died mysteriously in orphanages. They were well fed and sheltered. They had everything a baby needs, except mothers to love and cuddle them and sing songs to them. Adults too crave for touch and recognition from significant others. Those who are old and disabled miss love and hugs in the same way. Today, with life speeding away like a runaway train, the human need for touch and smiles and affirmation are often not meet. Sometimes hi-tech may mean that the need for hi-touch is often ignored.
Some days ago, we read about two Indian children in Norwary, being taken away from their parents for flimsy reasons: no proper toys, wrong position while feeding and a not high enough changing table. No material objects can really substitute the intangible benefits of parental love. Parents, except in a few extremely exceptional cases, can provide the best hi-touch care in the world.
Valentine’s day will soon be here. Maybe you can send off cheques for hugs, back rubs and compliments to your loved ones. Because love is not about things. It is about hi-touch: verbal, tonal and non-verbal actions. You can touch with a loving look and hug with a gentle, affirming word. Today when so much interaction is digital, let us not forget our powerful human need to be moved and touched by the ones we love.
Let us send out valentines to those we care for, entitled “What I really love about you is……..” everyday!
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