Transformation for Happy living

Transformation is what happens to a drop of water when it is touched by the magic of sunlight. It becomes a rainbow. It is what happens to a seed when it starts the journey to become a mighty banyan tree. The banyan tree is not an improved seed, just as a butterfly is not an improved caterpillar or a rainbow an improved drop of water.

Each of us has many opportunities for transformation. We can transform ourselves and others. Bringing laughter into the work place can install happiness in the system. The first laugh, can greet people as they enter the work place.  The last laugh will recycle them and make them fit for a joyful family life.

Life Greatest Gift - ‘Happiness’

Happiness is living with a sense of fulfillment and peace. It is a belief in the fundamental goodness of people, in the value of compassion, a policy of kindness, and a sense of unity among all living beings. ‘Happy’ is a word derived from ‘happ’ meaning luck or chance.

All beings seek happiness and act to avoid pain. Everyone is looking for something better. We can train the mind to be happy—it is an achievable goal. Most psychiatrists see people in distress and conclude that the most one can hope for is the transformation of despair into common unhappiness.

The Indian tradition shows us that positive radiant happiness is our birthright. Happiness quotient (HQ) is a concept that rates approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved in his life.

Whatever the external circumstances may be, the individual is responsible for his inner state. Events are not under our control, but our perceptions and reactions to them are. I believe that it is possible to realize one’s full potential for happiness by training the mind, body and soul to dwell in that state.

Happiness in Employment

Work occupies a central position in most lives. If you like your job then it is undoubtedly the best way to pursue happiness. Generally, people who are not satisfied with their jobs wait for Fridays. And that is exactly the reason why, the term, TGIF is so popular.  People want to go home and enjoy. Kahlil Gibran once asked, ‘What is it to work with love?’, to which the Prophet replied, ‘It is to weave the cloth from the strings of your heart as though your beloved were to wear it!’

So how can you deal with sadness in your career, at work. Firstly, you need to find something which really makes you happy. Let us look at some situations at work which cause sadness and how we can overcome it.

A.        Getting a pink slip: When you lose your job, sometimes, some people stop taking care of themselves. They get depressed and become a recluse of sorts. But there are others who use this as an opportunity to break away from the past and look for something more meaningful.  For instance, consider a doctor who lost his job in a hospital. He probably always wanted to be a writer. So he may use this loss as a tool to put his writing skills to good use.

One should always use such situations to meet new people, open up to life and not look at it as an obstacle. If you want to be happy, look at every event in your life as an opportunity

 B.                 Being overlooked for a promotion- If you are not climbing the professional ladder, at work, the way you want, then you need to network with others and find ways to improve the possibilities. Happiness is about taking a chance and proactively finding out the happenings at workplace.

Overcoming Sadness with Happiness

“You cannot change your family, your work or the events of your life. You can't even change yourself too much. 'Happy' is a word derived from 'happ' meaning luck or  chance.  Most  of  us  believe  that  happiness  is  a mysterious feeling that comes without reason, leaving as inexplicably  as it  arrived. Happiness is, in fact, living with a sense of fulfillment and peace. It is a belief in the fundamental goodness of people, in the  value  of compassion, a policy of kindness, and a sense of unity among all living beings. All beings seek happiness and act to avoid pain.  Everyone is looking for something better. Happiness can be achieved by a proactive attitude to improving the happiness quotient. We can train the mind to be happy—it is an achievable goal. Most psychiatrists see people in distress and  conclude  that  the  most  one  can  hope  for  is  the transformation of despair into common unhappiness. The Indian tradition shows us that positive radiant in the happiness quotient concept happiness is our birthright.  The Happiness Quotient (HQ) is a concept that rates approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved  in  his  life.  

Affirmations for Dharmic Living

Be a loving participant in your life.  Enjoy the now of it.  Don’t be a dreamer or a spectator.  A happy life is the result of diving deep and becoming engaged and involved.’

(Sit with eyes closed and affirm silently)

I live by my own ethical standards.

I do what I preach.

I help all and harm none.

Peace and goodwill surround me.

Buddha And Ananda—The Four Rs: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle And Repair

Young and handsome Ananda become the leader of a monastery when Buddha left his physical body.  The townsmen were skeptical. They felt he was too young and frivolous.

They went in a group and asked him what the old bed sheets were to be used for as the monastery had just been given new ones. Ananda said, ‘I had them cut into towels for the monks.  ‘When those get worn out, what will you do?’  they asked.

           

‘I will fold them, stitch them and use them as doormats for monks coming in from the rain. Still they persisted. ‘What will you do when those too get worn out?’ ‘I will have them cut into strips to use in the kitchen to handle hot vessels.’

‘Why do you take so much trouble over old bed sheets?’ they asked. Ananda reflected for a while, then he said, ‘The life blood of some mother, some human being has been poured into making those sheets. That human effort should be treated with respect,’ he said. The townsmen left satisfied that Buddha had chosen well.

A Yellow Box

Breaking the boundaries and thinking outside the box can have interesting results.

Space is often treated like a closed box. The Japanese poets have always spoken of the skyscape and trees and landscape being part of the living space. Designs should celebrate the sky and trees that surround the space. Consider the concept of stress-free architecture. Old Indian village homes had a pot of water at the entrance to wash ones feet and face. How would it be to walk through water as you enter a house?

The Japanese who have a culture of discipline where one rarely disagrees with an elder, keep punching bags in their offices to combat increasing levels of daily stress and long working hours, I would recommend a stress-busting corner in every working and living space. A place to absorb the earth’s energy by walking barefoot on a safe, springy patch of grass. A central space in skyscrapers, where trees can grow and birds can sing and sunshine can pour into the hearts of concrete jungles. I still remember the circular shape of a hospital in Mangalore, with its gardens and flowing water in the middle. ‘No one can get well, if they cannot see the sky, smell the flowers and hear the flowing water,’ said its chairman.

The Belur Halebid sculptures were originally lit up with sunlight falling on strategically placed mirrors. The mirrors are gone, but, light still falls on these works of sublime art. Mirrors can be used to bring gardens into the space. Homes should celebrate light and air. Sunlight can pour into homes and sleep curled up like a warm puppy on the carpet.

Living spaces should have plenty of touchable, soft, stress-reducing objects and textures.

Monster of Human Being

The monsters of anger, greed and jealousy, shroud the gardens of the mind, poisoning the blood and turning it into a desolate wasteland of disease. Today, so much of our lives are spent in the office. The corporate jungle takes an unimaginable toll on the heart. Nature’s ultimate survival mechanism of fight or flight becomes a chronic response. This is because of the endless deadlines, the deadly competitiveness and the need for a constant state of high alert. One crisis leads to another. The body is constantly awash with the fight and flight response, resulting from a threat to survival.

Such a response is like using an atom bomb to kill an ant —totally inappropriate. But awareness is absent and the body responds as though to annihilation, moment to moment. Due to the modern urge to change jobs rapidly, many executives find themselves in threatening environments surrounded by potential enemies. They have had no time to develop friends or trusted supports. Every day they walk into the modern equivalent of a jungle infested with wild animals and danger. Family support systems are far away. Nuclear families build up explosive pressure due to a revolution of rising expectations, fuelled by the media.

Avoid Loneliness

Reisman speaks of the ‘lonely crowd’. Loneliness, a sense of exclusion, is a poison that can cause illness as easily as a virus or bacteria. Loneliness is the most lethal of modern diseases. For example, newly widowed women have a higher rate of breast cancer than wives or single women.

The break-up of community feelings, urbanisation, highly competitive workplaces, have increased the possibility of toxic workplaces.

Learning the Relaxation Response through meditation, yoga nidra, prayer or even deep breathing will help you identify the state of your body when you are relaxed, and the acceleration of the system when you are in the clutches of the Big Five emotions kama, krodha, madha, lobha and matsarya (lust, anger, possessiveness, greed and jealousy). Mindfulness will help you unclench and relax the muscles, slow down the racing heartbeat. You can start by consciously breathing slowly and calmly.

Doing a good deed or helping others seems to have an enhanced immune response. Watching a film about Mother Theresa is also known to enhance positive emotions. Welcome and embrace active positive emotions. They are the success of life, the secret of health, the foundation of energy. This may be the reason for the success of movements like Rotary and Lions, organisation that practice service as a way of life. 

Enjoy Your Work

Many of us spend most of our time at work. If we do not enjoy our work, if we feel overwhelmed by it, it will surely damage us. The constant pressure of negative emotions causes inescapable damage to our arteries and other delicate tissues. It also slows down the body’s capacity to repair this damage.

To work at something you love, to be ‘self-actualized’ in Maslow’s terms, is to protect yourself against dying young. As Khalil Gibran wrote, ‘What is it to work with love?... It is to weave the cloth from the strings of your heart, as though your beloved were to wear it.’

Politics can make the blood boil with suppressed rage and unexpressed anxiety. ‘Fast tracking,’ being a corporate star, will extract the inevitable price of damage to arteries if you are not ‘mindful’, if you are not aware of the impact of everything you do on your system.

Affirmations for Family Bonding

(Sit with eyes closed and silently affirm)

         I have a safe and happy home.

         I enjoy unconditional love.

         The food I eat and the water I drink here nourish me.

         God blesses us and keeps our children safe.

         This home is a sanctuary and a refuge.

         All conflicts can be solved.

Mindspower

The mind is central to success in business today. Carl Segan wrote of the mind: ‘Every human being has the capacity to store the equivalent of 7550 volumes of the Encyclopedia Britannica.’ Women managers, like men, need to develop the powers of their mind. The Indian ethos gives us key answers in this journey towards having a razor-sharp mind that can cut through all that is superfluous to the heart of truth. Develop the ability to wipe your mind clean and silent through meditation, because great concepts can be created only when the mindspace is clear of mindless static.’

As the first few generation of women who have entered the workplace, women managers must conquer fear and overcome the need for instructions. Pursue the ability to adapt and be a leader of proactive change. The New World is not for those who are what Nehru called, unwilling victims, dragged to be sacrificed on the altar of change. It is for the promoters of change. Those who dictate the unknown future. Women must be leaders to be accepted as such. They need to banish forever their fear of being centre stage, their reluctance to accept that; they are where the buck stops.

Energy from Positive and Negative Forces

‘We draw energy from the wind or air and sunlight. We draw energy from water, earth (things grown on the earth).  We also draw energy from the divine forces of the universe, which pour into us through the chakras.

The sun pours heat, light and vitality, which greatly improves health and wellbeing.  That is why people feel depressed during the winter especially in the far North, like Scandinavian countries and the Arctic

A place can have a positive or negative field.  You can feel it when you enter a temple or church where regular services are performed. That is why people go to places of pilgrimage like Tirupathi. The feeling of prayerful sacredness envelopes all who go to that space.

During a disaster, a cloud of fear is created.  Anyone who enters that space is filled with fear, even if he is normally brave. The infectious nature of all emotions is similar. Hatred speaks from mind to mind, till the cloud of hatred draws to it all the people in that space even when the person is usually rational.

How to deal with Depression

Depression is signaled by a pervasive low mood, loss of interest, in everyday activities.

The person has a lowered ability to enjoy things or experience pleasure. ‘Nothing pleases me,’ a depressed person will say. ‘I did not feel like waking up in the morning. Combing my hair and bathing needed a major effort.’ This is how a depressed person feels and all of us are depressed at one time or another. No laboratory can confirm this. Doctors have to depend on what the patient says. It can appear suddenly or be a life-long disorder. This can affect one’s whole life and harshly impact the family and its ability to enjoy life.

Treat Depression

• Being able to rise above the gloom is crucial. Soothe yourself by talking kindly to yourself. First-aid by the self is necessary while we are feeling low, insulted or tired.

• Any form of meditation or silence will heal and illuminate your inner space.