Mindful Parent

Children need the security of a simple, dependable schedule. Ambiguity or lack of dependability in family life is known to affect the individual’s capacity to live in a secure long-term relationship in the future. The family provides the love and nurturing required for the survival of children Affirmation is important when people in our lives appreciate us and express it verbally, tonally, non-verbally. The opposite of an affirmation is a discount. You need at least ten affirmations for every discount for the maintenance of a healthy relationship. A home filled with discounts becomes a torture chamber instead of a sanctuary.

Healthy diet is very important for children’s growth. Forget grandma’s belief that fat children are healthy children. The Zero Heart Attack Path (ZHAP)diet is just as good for kids. A ZHAP home will provide the foundation for a healthy adulthood. These years are dangerous years when unhealthy emotional patterns are learnt. Food often becomes a source of solace. Be a mindful parent.

Emotional Environment for Happiness

In order to treat or prevent disease, it is essential to look into our emotional, mental and psychological environment, as our thoughts and emotions directly contribute to our wellbeing or otherwise. Meditation can clean up the field and contribute enormously to an individual’s psychological and physiological wellbeing.

How to create a positive field around yourself, your home and office?

Ø A mental process which draws a magic circle of love around all those who are participating.

Ø A prayer or mantra said together.

Ø A common exercise, a company song, common goals.

Ø A handshake, a friendly look, an encouraging word.

Ø Thinking, believing and acting in a positive manner.

Ø Laughter and shared jokes.

Give yourself happiness breaks every day: call an old, lonely relative and take her shopping once a month. Schedule a beauty parlour date for yourself, once a month. Read a great book. Listen to fabulous music.

Healthy Networking for Happiness

The world is in your drawing room, through television and internet it is clamouring to change your life with more and more sophisticated toys. As a popular saying goes, ‘What separates the men from the boys, is just the price of their toys.’ Simplify and go home to what you really need. The world is like a buffet counter at a five-star hotel. Let’s not grab everything on our plates. Let us be choosy, so that we may avoid spiritual indigestion and physical exhaustion. Let us put family first. Finding a job you love is one of the ways you can immunize yourself against health problems. A good marriage is a protective shield against health attacks. One should consistently cultivate the positive emotions of love, compassion, courage and peace, not merely avoid negative emotions in the family.

1. Budget for family time every day

2. Plan for meals together

3. Pray together

4. Plan an annual get together of the extended family.

5. Create a family face book page

Build Family Bonding

‘The family is the shock absorber of society, to which the bruised and battered individual returns after doing battle with the world,’ wrote Alvin Toffler in his classic ‘Future Shock’. The breakdown of the joint family has led to a loosening of extended family relationships. The large, amorphous, supportive joint family that supported a wide variety of people and bestowed unconditional love for the crippled, the old and the helpless, has been reduced to the nuclear family where everyone is in sharp focus.

It is our mission to restore the family to its traditional role as a place of rest and healing, in a new paradigm. There should be one person in the family who can cushion the blows of the outside world. Someone who is not too busy to listen, give support, and manage the daily tasks of living. This could even be a paid caregiver or cook. Networking with parents, in-laws, neighbours, domestic help and friends is the key for working couples.

Protective Friendships

Friendship can immunize you against heart attacks, confirms research by Dean Ornish, MD. Those with five or more close friends are more likely to avoid heart problems. The real epidemic is not heart attacks but attacks of loneliness and sadness. Those who feel their wives love them, are more likely to recover from a heart attacks says the same research.

The basis of social success lies in the ability to build successful, pleasantly harmonious, lifetime relationships with all. When you meet anyone, always look for what is good. Listen for value. Celebrate the positive in all interactions. Rest assured that God did not create you for the sole purpose of correcting others or making them unhappy. You are not the world’s policeman.

Belonging to a supportive nurturing group is the best protection you can have against disease and unhappiness. Being loved can prevent you from the flood of negative emotions that have the capacity to destroy you. Take steps today to make sure that you cannot be replaced by a blanket or a computer.

Explore Yourself

‘Every person has before him a hundred alternative futures. You can change that scene, by spending more time with your family. The mind is the only place where you can examine a germinal, fragile new idea, stretch it without breaking it or explore an explosive new idea without having it blow up in your face. Use thinking tools and imaging to analyse, reinvent and recreate life as it is today. You are a powerhouse of potential. The great Michelangelo was once asked how he created great statues. Old and half blind, Michelangelo stood before a block of marble, scarred and muddy from the quarries ofCarrara. He said quietly, ‘I have never created a statue. I just stand before a block of marble and study it with reverence. For I know that within every block of marble, there lies a statue, waiting to be liberated by the touch of the Within each of us lies hidden a masterpiece waiting to be liberated by the magic touch of attention. Only you can do it. Be your own ‘expert’. Do not build negative ideas about yourself through the comments of others. Your self-talk should be calm, happy and elevating. Choose to see and hear what is beautiful and encouraging.

Contentment - Path to Happiness.

Contentment with whatever you have is the greatest path to happiness. Comparison with those better than us makes us discontented. Comparison with those who are worse off makes us proud and arrogant. Shanti or a peaceful, calm mind, suffused with affection and compassion, makes our field a happy one while spreading like a fragrance to embrace all those around us. Everyone has only two choices—life-enhancing and lifedestroying. An event is not as critical as is your reaction or perception of it. It continues its life inside you, a nuclear landmine of memories that wreak far more destruction than the actual event. The more mindspace you allocate to unhappy memories, the more time you spend in the past while being a spectator in the living present, the more you miss the joy the present moment offers. At any given time, the past should not inhabit more than five per cent of your mindspace, and the future should not exceed ten per cent. Did you know that human beings are the only creatures who can think about the future? This ability should be devoted to a rational planning exercise, not aimless daydreaming that nibbles at your day like a rat in a godown of rice. We have a choice to look at failure and loss as a life-lesson, or to carry it with us till we are bent over with their crippling burden. They make us tired and discouraged to handle the opportunities of the present. They echo in our mindspace in a tone that is vicious, critical, chipping away at our resolve to do battle for progress. We need to change the way we talk to and treat ourselves. All of us need a tender, loving caretaker within who nurtures us, not an internal drillmaster who victimises us in an insulting and disparaging tone, sucking out all our energy, enthusiasm and happiness.

Happiness Breaks

Ambition and increasing peer-pressure ensure the ‘rat in a trap syndrome’, wherein you are trapped into running faster and faster to stay in the same place. The twenty-first century is the century of the Mind. The Mind is man’s last unconquered frontier. The Upanishads describe it as fast, fickle and uncontrollable, like a dozen swift horses travelling at breakneck speed. Mankind is paying a steep price for failing to learn more about the Mind before embarking on the race for success in the new millennium. Stress is the price we pay for success. Stress stalks the precarious climb up the corporate

ladder.

Focus on happiness, not the lack of it. I believe the focus on stress and unhappiness should be turned upside down. Instead of attracting unhappiness, we should plant a garden of happiness, by welcoming the positive emotions into our lives—love, compassion, wonder, courage, laughter and peace. Focusing on our unhappiness

only helps to provide more power and attention to the negative person, event or object that causes it. Take some happiness breaks. Focus on cultivating happy people and avoid toxic people. Build protective walls against toxic events that threaten your tranquillity.

Take care of what is yours and enjoy it.

Overcoming the Failures and Loss

No one can avoid bad times, but you can ensure that you look at this time as a time for growth and learning. When the mind-numbing pain that immediately follows loss has subsided, you can take proactive steps to provide emergency attention to heal your body, mind and spirit. Pour music into your soul. Touch people who love you. Explore new places. Reach into great books and study alternate futures. Pamper yourself and ask your loved ones for hugs. Meditate. Be silent. Plug into the universe. Let go. Let God catch you. Yoursankalpa or intention must be pure. Be clear about your goal. Be non-judgmental. Love and seek to understand with tenderness.

Learn and immerse yourself in knowledge. Learn all you can about your chosen field from books, internet, from people, competitors. Remain focused. Never give up. Help others, motivate them! Let others achieve their targets. Say no to negative people and emotions. Go on to achieve your highest potential. Look for the highest in others. Know your purpose on earth, the highest that God created you to become to question injustice. Stand up for those who cannot fight, speak for those who have no voice. Speak gently and with love. Receive his compliments, gifts and encouragement with grace.

Admire the beauty of Nature

This is a very useful, feel-good emotion. Welcome wonder into you life. Celebrate the beauty of the stars, and enjoy the wonder of the mountains. Greet the dawn and say goodbye to the sunset. The moonlight has been created to heal your wounds. Admire the beauty of Mother Nature and become a child again.

* Be alone in silence with nature at the beginning and end of every day.

* Enjoy a walk among tall trees and green gardens.

* Plant seeds and saplings. Distribute them.

* Set apart time for prayer to praise God for His glorious creation.

* Set apart time to enjoy beauty.

Better way to reduce stress

One way to break the pattern of stressful living and strive for personal wellness is to change the responses to tough situations. There is, of course, no way to make the situations less tough. Meditation and pranayama provide a way of reducing the automatic and violent reactions to stress. You can actually control autonomous systems like heartbeat and pulse rate, which were thought to be outside the individual’s control. Knowing and practising meditation can provide you with a silent space where you can retreat into peace: slow breathing, steady heartbeat, low pulse. This space is always available within a person who has learnt to meditate.

Modern Women in Dual Role

Women have moved into the workforce in an unmistakable wave. In modern societies today, many of them bear the dual burden of managing a home and career. The infrastructure necessary to help them: crèches, dependable childcare, help from husbands, gadgets to make housework easier, is not yet in place. This generation of transitional women is at high risk from heart disease, particularly during the menopausal years. Statistics show that women have fifty per cent chance of dying of heart disease, ten times higher than their risk of dying by breast cancer. Dual responsibilities have reduced the woman’s capacity to perform her role of a primary caregiver. Her ability to absorb and reduce tensions has been greatly compromised. A common response is the super-mom syndrome. This is a woman who feels that she can be a super career woman and a super-mom. Maintaining this dazzling image can have a damaging impact on the overall health of women in this transitional era. The changing structure of the family, the blurred role definitions are certainly risk factors in the emerging pattern of early heart disease. Huge reserves of patience are required to cope with this new, changed family structure. Most do not have these reserves.

Effects of Global Economy on Quality of Life and Health

The current development of the global economy indicates that the 173 countries of the world will soon share a single marketplace. Demand and supply will respond to the compulsions of global competitiveness. Every country is eyeing the Rs 1.2 billion-strong Indian market and its fabled 250 million middle class. No company can escape the restructuring, downsizing and blood-letting that is rampant today. The possibility of the pink slip stares every executive in the face.

It is being slowly realized that economic prosperity can lead to poverty in the quality of life and health. Is India gradually becoming a global back-office with uninteresting, boring, repetitive jobs being dumped on us? Is the joy of craftsmanship being replaced by the monotony of the assembly line? The expanding global economy and its resultant lethal workplace have created serious conflicts in the individual’s life. Many have to confront the question of how their values measure up viv-à-vis their need to own and have the world’s goodies.

Life was more happier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits!

Work follows us everywhere. The blurring of work and leisure

has intensified in this era of twenty-four-hour access, when the

computer is just a fingertip away and the Blackberry and the cell

phone are as intimate as a heartbeat. The delicate tissues of the body

are constantly awash in the lethal chemical bath of chronic stress.

Interactive electronic devices have made stress continuous. Home is

no longer a refuge.

The revolution of rising expectations, fuelled by the global

perspective, provided by the media and internet creates unrelenting

stress. Einstein, Time magazine’s ‘Man of the Twentieth Century,’

warns: The concern for man and his destiny must always be the chief

interest of all technical effort. Never forget it among your diagrams

and equations.

Body and Stress

Any of the big five emotions—kama, kroda, madha, lobha, matsarya (lust, anger, arrogance, greed, jealousy, respectively) can flood the body with the chemicals of stress. Stress is destructive. Stress is ageing. Stress is a killer. Let us consider the most common emotion of this century— anger. What happens when you are angry? Thirty-six chemicals pour into the blood—lethal chemicals like adrenaline and histamine. Blood rushes through the heart, blood pressure and pulse rates shoot up. The rate of breathing increases. The body gets ready to fight or flee. Digestion is switched off. All parts of the brain, except the primitive ‘lizard brain’, are switched off.

The force of blood-flow in an enraged person causes minute tears in the tender fabric of the arteries. Fatty deposits find a convenient place to park themselves to repair the tears, and cholesterol, the plaster of paris of the body, slowly builds up to occlude the artery. Soon the tender flexible artery becomes stiff and hard, preparing the stage for a heart attack.

Be Happy - Get Relieved from Stress

he twenty-first century is the century of the Mind. The Mind is man’s last unconquered frontier. The Upanishads describe it as fast, fickle and uncontrollable, like a dozen swift horses travelling at breakneck speed. Mankind is paying a steep price for failing to learn more about the Mind before embarking on the race for success in the new millennium. Stress is the price we pay

for success. Stress stalks the precarious climb up the corporate ladder. The fashionable corporate high of fast-track leaders—eyes shining, excess nervous energy, multi-tasking, dynamism personified—is achieved at the expense of a tissue-destroying ‘fight or flight’ response. These individuals do not manage to have ‘rest and repair’ periods between emotional hijacks. Constant pressure fuels the adrenaline rush and damages the arteries. It adds to the flow of chemicals like cortisone and adrenaline in your blood. No one can be n a constant ‘fight or flight’ high and not destroy themselves. Today, twenty-somethings are dropping dead from heart attacks. A bypass surgery in the thirties has become a status symbol. The personal cost of stress includes burnout, chronic, disabling illnesses, crippling tensions in family life, and a loss of personal fulfillment and joy. The casualties are often children who live in the high-tension, pressure-cooker climate created in the homes of corporate high fliers.

The twenty-first century is the century of the Mind. The Mind is man’s last unconquered frontier. The Upanishads describe it as fast, fickle and uncontrollable, like a dozen swift horses travelling at breakneck speed. Mankind is paying a steep price for failing to learn more about the Mind before embarking on the race for success in the new millennium. Stress is the price we pay for success. Stress stalks the precarious climb up the corporate ladder. The fashionable corporate high of fast-track leaders—eyes shining, excess nervous energy, multi-tasking, dynamism personified—is achieved at the expense of a tissue-destroying ‘fight or flight’ response. These individuals do not manage to have ‘rest and repair’ periods between emotional hijacks. Constant pressure fuels the adrenaline rush and damages the arteries. It adds to the flow of chemicals like cortisone and adrenaline in your blood. No one can be n a constant ‘fight or flight’ high and not destroy themselves. Today, twenty-somethings are dropping dead from heart attacks. A bypass surgery in the thirties has become a status symbol. The personal cost of stress includes burnout, chronic, disabling illnesses, crippling tensions in family life, and a loss of personal fulfillment and joy. The casualties are often children who live in the high-tension, pressure-cooker climate created in the homes of corporate high fliers.

Attitude decides altitude

As a famous saying goes, ‘Attitude decides the altitude.’ An attitude transplant is required to fill your blood with the chemicals of bliss. Soar on your positive attitude. A positive attitude takes you to higher altitudes. If the climate inside you is positive, it radiates all around you.

To create positive actions

• Pray together

• Sing together

• Listen with empathy

• Exercise together

• Practice yoga and meditation

• Deal as an equal

• Eliminate status and rank

• Give up all rights to punish or discipline

Prana – Life Force of All Human Beings!

Prana creates a field of possibilities where the seed of any idea develops rapidly, where our activities proceed smoothly and bear rich dividends. To develop prana, meditation, pranayama and a calm attitude are key. Freshly-cooked healthy food, pure fresh air and yogic exercise nurture and enhance prana. When prana is in full flow, the person is full of vitality, energy and enthusiasm. Prana is the life-force that flows in all living things. Eating too much, consuming stale food, exercising till you are ready to drop dead, constant arguments, overworking, getting emotionally upset, breathing polluted air, all interfere with the smooth flow of prana. Moderation is the rule.

Steps to Increase Positive Space Around You

• Keep your surroundings and living spaces clean.
• Create beauty in them with flowers and crystals.
• Keep them well-furnished.
• Fill them with music.
• Be mindful of what passes your lips—food and words. Let them be healthy.

The Power of a Sacred Space

A sacred space is defined by the rules of conduct laid down for those who enter, as in a court room, a church, a temple or the parliament. Very few misbehave in such places as they are rarely able to cast away the weight of laws and customs built over centuries around them. A person who maintains dignity and decorum in such a place may behave totally different in a bar or when at a party.

The Tibetians of the Shambala tradition believe in a concept called drala by which any space can be made sacred. Drala is created by the reverence, purity and faith within a space. When a person treats his offi ce space with reverence and keeps it clean and sparkling, he attracts drala into that space. Drala makes that space powerful and

attractive. When he dresses carefully, speaks and acts mindfully, he attracts personal drala.

Many are able to do this in their homes. Indian homes have beautiful white flower patterns drawn at the entrance to attract Lakshmi, the Goddess of Good Fortune. The atmosphere is further enhanced by the fragrance of incense and joss sticks. Certain sounds like that of mantras or the sound of bells, or wind chimes in a Chinese home, are said to purify the field.

Positive Energy

Energy causes all beings to act in this world. The higher the level of energy, the greater the accomplishments. When we are tired, our energy level plummets and we do not feel like doing anything. When the field around us is negative with hurt, anger, possessiveness, greed, jealousy, fear and abhorrence, we are less able to act with speed and efficiency. These emotions suck the energy and life-force out of us. All beings have within them the all-pervading life-force, the same one that creates and sustains life in the universe.

· A mental process which draws a magic circle around all those who are participating.

· A prayer or mantra.

· A common exercise, a company song, common goals.

· A handshake, a friendly look, an encouraging word.

· Thinking, believing and acting in a positive manner.

· .Laughter and shared jokes.

Good Food for Healthy Living

Food brings people together, allows human beings to feel satisfied and comfortable, connects us with the earth and provides us with health. You are what you eat. Hurry, worry, anger, distractions and chattering should be avoided while eating. The following discipline for eating will help us to enjoy good health

· Sit down peacefully to eat. Close your eyes and allow your mind to leave all other subjects and return to the food before you.

· Choose the fuel for rebuilding your body with care.

· Thank the universe for creating the food that will give you the energy to accomplish your goals.

· Focus on the sight, smell, feel, touch, and finally the taste of the food you are eating. As you chew, be completely assured that the food is gently repairing all the cells of your body.

Physical fitness for Happy and Jofyful Life

‘Physical fitness’ is of utmost importance as it is the starting point for wellness of the mind and spirit. Take care of yourself as no one else can do it for you. Sushruta Samhita, the ancient Indian work by the physician Sushruta, describes perfect health as a state where all body parts function at their optimal level and wherein the body, mind and spirit are in perfect balance and in a state of bliss. Health is not a state but a continuous adjustment to the changing demands of life and the environment. Positive health implies perfect functioning of body and mind in a given society. All the ancients believed that no attempt should be made to cure the body without treating the soul. The concept of optimum health has been termed ‘wellness’. It is a sense of all-round wellbeing. In order to treat or prevent disease, it is essential to look into our emotional, mental and psychological environment, as our thoughts and emotions directly contribute to our wellbeing or otherwise. Meditation can contribute enormously to an individual’s psychological and physiological wellbeing.

Health Guide for Happiness

The first exercise in the ancient pranayama tradition—the art of filling every part of your body with life-force or prana. According to the ancients, Brahma the Creator has put in a certain predetermined number of breaths into every creature. If a person gives in to intemperate passions, the first system to be affected is his breathing, followed by a chain reaction that causes the pulse and heart rate to escalate, digestion to stall,muscles to stiffen, and the brain to stop thinking rationally. He who uses up his designated number of breaths faster succumbs to death earlier.

‘Adbuta,’ or wonder, is one of the positive navarasas— the nine emotions. It heals and energises. To stand in wonder before the splendour of God’s creation is to be rejuvenated. The body and bloodstream are bathed in endorphins and serotonins which are Nature’s tranquillisers.’ The body is the boat human beings are given to sail across the sea of life. It is your duty to take care of it.’

Happiness is everyone’s responsibility

Happiness is a gift, not a commodity. We all have a choice to make every moment, through our senses, our thoughts and our actions. We can choose what we want to see, hear, touch, taste and smell, think, feel and do. Most of the time, we are responsible for our decisions—for our happiness and unhappiness. We can decide how we want to feel even in the worst possible situations. To a jealous mind, an innocent smile is proof of adultery; a prisoner can choose to keep the flame of freedom alive and maintain a cheerful disposition. Events or people around us are not under our control. But our reactions, our responses to them are. Respond with love and peace. The ecology and geography of your inner mindspace is in your hands. Study how to deal with each of your five senses to be happy. Focus on happiness, not the lack of it. Focusing on our unhappiness only helps to provide more power and attention to the negative person, event or object that causes it. Focus on cultivating happy people and avoid toxic people. Build protective walls against toxic events that threaten your tranquillity. Happiness is everyone’s responsibility.

A Blue print for Joyful Life

At each stage of life, it is human nature to feel that the things would be better at the next stage. One would tend to think that he will be happy after getting a good job and a healthy pay packet. At some point the feeling of frustration creeps in and he would feel that he would be happy once he gets married and have children. This search for happiness continues as he passes through each stage. The truth is there is no better time to be happy than right now. Life is full of challenges. It is better to admit as much and decide to be happy in spite of it all. There is no road to happiness. Happiness is the road.

To quote the words of Greek Philosopher, Democritus, “Happiness resides not in possessions and not in gold.” Happiness of life is made of minute fractions like a simple smile, a helping hand, a heartfelt compliment and countless other infinitesimals of pleasurable thought and genial feeling. The sad part is in our pursuit of happiness we fail to recognize this magnificent feeling that is just there right at the end of our nose.

Happiness is, in fact, living with a sense of fulfillment and peace. It is a belief in the fundamental goodness of people, in the value of compassion, a policy of kindness, and a sense of unity among all living beings.

Follow the dog

Physical transformation is possible, if like the ancient yogis, we follow the actions of young animals. Watch the young dog. It is always in movement and bouncing and stretching. Make physical movement a part of your daily life. As the salesmen say ‘Cover territory instead of covering your chair’. ‘Use it or lose it’ said Jane Fonda. Violent physical exercise once a week is no use, if you’re just vegetating for the rest of the week in front of the T.V or computer. Listen more and bark less, use non verbal actions to show unconditional affection to family and friends.

Listen to your body. If you are tired, rest. If you are hungry, eat. If you are lonely, communicate, ask for a hug. If you are angry, deal with your anger constructively, resolve it. The body is our vehicle for the journey of our soul in this world. You may be an immortal soul who happens to own a body, but the body-vehicle has to be maintained in good condition, so that we may achieve the goals for which we were created.

Turn on the fountain of love to help find joy

The latest corporate buzz is to make people happy at workspace - to liberate the butterflies, turn on the fountain of love and to help find joy in the small things in life. "In workspace, people should have two real daily laughs - the first laugh and the last laugh’

"Companies were waking up to the need to make their workers happy. At ICICI Bank, in one of its Mumbai branches, allows its workers to bring their kids to the workplace on Saturdays. The children have fun for a couple of hours while their parents work. And then they take off directly from the office for the weekend," people spend two-thirds of their working hours in office and happy employees can do double the work compared to their unhappy colleagues. Nowadays more and more women were working from home after they have babies.

Preventing stress is a negative way of looking at life; "instead, fill your mind with your garden of poetic emotions like laughter, wonder, love and compassion to counter lust, anger, obsession, greed, jealousy, fear and repulsion.”

Pursuit of happiness

Around every person there is a field of emotional energy. Some people always look radiant, and everything in their life flourishes and grows. They have a positive energy field around them. Some people, on the other hand, always have a morose or tense air about them, and everything in their life seems to fade and die. They have a negative energy field around them. A positive field is created by positive emotions and a negative field draws sustenance from negative emotions.

Energy causes all beings to act in this world. The higher the level of energy, the greater would be their accomplishments. When we are tired, our energy levels plummets and we do not feel like doing anything. When the field around is negative with hurt, anger, possessiveness, greed, jealousy, fear and abhorrence, we are less able to act with speed and efficiency. These emotions suck the energy and lifeforce out of us.

New Rules for Women Managers

Woman managers need to appreciate that it takes heroic energy to rock the cradle and rock the corporate world.

 First pin a badge for bravery on yourself for attempting it.

 Then, promise you will not even begin to tread the path that leads to the joyless land of being a super-woman or super-mom.

 Enlist your men and families as willing accomplices in the challenging task of reconstructing a corporate workplace that lovingly accommodates the needs of humans, for families, for music, poetry and time for just standing and watching the world go by!

 Be kind to yourself. Love yourself.

 Conquer fear and overcome the need for instructions.

 Pursue the ability to adapt and be a leader of proactive change.

 The New World is not for those who are what Nehru called unwilling victims, dragged to be sacrificed on the altar of change.

 Be leaders to be accepted as such. Banish forever your fear of being centre stage, your reluctance to accept that you are where the buck stops.

 Relearn and re-install the software of the human heart that your mothers embodied.

 The New Woman of the past decade must not forsaken her heritage of loving and caring for the tough hard-bitten so-called ‘male boss model.’

 Both men and women managers need to put the human being at the centre of all business processes.

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How to Develop Work-Life Balance

Love yourself enough to outsource
Take short relaxation breaks, at least thrice a day.
Eat fresh, energy-giving foods.
Take a walk outdoors during lunch break.
Spend time reading and improving your mind.
Involve your spouse and children in your work. Bring them to the office during lunch break or on a Saturday.
Get involved in activities that will benefit others.
Develop an absorbing hobby or skill—driving, dancing, gardening, carpentry, painting, amateur radio…
Keep in touch with your close friends and extended family, use the power of the internet.
Plan to cut off from work on weekends.
Meditate. Take care of yourself.

Laughter Breaks

Laughter increases the levels of endorphins in our bodies, which are natural pain-killers. Norman Cousins, an American journalist who wrote “Anatomy Of An Illness” was suffering from an incurable disease of the spine. Laughter therapy helped him when no pain-killer could. Endorphins released as a result of laughter may help in reducing the intensity of pain in those suffering from arthritis, spondylitis and muscular spasms of the body. Many women have also reported a reduced frequency of migraine and tension headaches. Norman Cousins recovered from what is usually a fatal disease

He who laughs frequently is less likely to suffer from heart attacks. ‘A light answer turneth away wrath,’ says a proverb. An anger hijack can be stopped by a joke. Laughter is certainly the best medicine.

You can be happy by taking regular laughter breaks. There are a number of causes for high blood pressure and heart disease like heredity, obesity, smoking and excessive intake of saturated fats. But stress is one of the main factors. Laughter definitely helps control blood pressure by reducing the release of stress-related hormones and bringing relaxation.

Transformation for Happy living

Transformation is what happens to a drop of water when it is touched by the magic of sunlight. It becomes a rainbow. It is what happens to a seed when it starts the journey to become a mighty banyan tree. The banyan tree is not an improved seed, just as a butterfly is not an improved caterpillar or a rainbow an improved drop of water.

Each of us has many opportunities for transformation. We can transform ourselves and others. Bringing laughter into the work place can install happiness in the system. The first laugh, can greet people as they enter the work place.  The last laugh will recycle them and make them fit for a joyful family life.

Life Greatest Gift - ‘Happiness’

Happiness is living with a sense of fulfillment and peace. It is a belief in the fundamental goodness of people, in the value of compassion, a policy of kindness, and a sense of unity among all living beings. ‘Happy’ is a word derived from ‘happ’ meaning luck or chance.

All beings seek happiness and act to avoid pain. Everyone is looking for something better. We can train the mind to be happy—it is an achievable goal. Most psychiatrists see people in distress and conclude that the most one can hope for is the transformation of despair into common unhappiness.

The Indian tradition shows us that positive radiant happiness is our birthright. Happiness quotient (HQ) is a concept that rates approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved in his life.

Whatever the external circumstances may be, the individual is responsible for his inner state. Events are not under our control, but our perceptions and reactions to them are. I believe that it is possible to realize one’s full potential for happiness by training the mind, body and soul to dwell in that state.

Happiness in Employment

Work occupies a central position in most lives. If you like your job then it is undoubtedly the best way to pursue happiness. Generally, people who are not satisfied with their jobs wait for Fridays. And that is exactly the reason why, the term, TGIF is so popular.  People want to go home and enjoy. Kahlil Gibran once asked, ‘What is it to work with love?’, to which the Prophet replied, ‘It is to weave the cloth from the strings of your heart as though your beloved were to wear it!’

So how can you deal with sadness in your career, at work. Firstly, you need to find something which really makes you happy. Let us look at some situations at work which cause sadness and how we can overcome it.

A.        Getting a pink slip: When you lose your job, sometimes, some people stop taking care of themselves. They get depressed and become a recluse of sorts. But there are others who use this as an opportunity to break away from the past and look for something more meaningful.  For instance, consider a doctor who lost his job in a hospital. He probably always wanted to be a writer. So he may use this loss as a tool to put his writing skills to good use.

One should always use such situations to meet new people, open up to life and not look at it as an obstacle. If you want to be happy, look at every event in your life as an opportunity

 B.                 Being overlooked for a promotion- If you are not climbing the professional ladder, at work, the way you want, then you need to network with others and find ways to improve the possibilities. Happiness is about taking a chance and proactively finding out the happenings at workplace.

Overcoming Sadness with Happiness

“You cannot change your family, your work or the events of your life. You can't even change yourself too much. 'Happy' is a word derived from 'happ' meaning luck or  chance.  Most  of  us  believe  that  happiness  is  a mysterious feeling that comes without reason, leaving as inexplicably  as it  arrived. Happiness is, in fact, living with a sense of fulfillment and peace. It is a belief in the fundamental goodness of people, in the  value  of compassion, a policy of kindness, and a sense of unity among all living beings. All beings seek happiness and act to avoid pain.  Everyone is looking for something better. Happiness can be achieved by a proactive attitude to improving the happiness quotient. We can train the mind to be happy—it is an achievable goal. Most psychiatrists see people in distress and  conclude  that  the  most  one  can  hope  for  is  the transformation of despair into common unhappiness. The Indian tradition shows us that positive radiant in the happiness quotient concept happiness is our birthright.  The Happiness Quotient (HQ) is a concept that rates approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved  in  his  life.  

Affirmations for Dharmic Living

Be a loving participant in your life.  Enjoy the now of it.  Don’t be a dreamer or a spectator.  A happy life is the result of diving deep and becoming engaged and involved.’

(Sit with eyes closed and affirm silently)

I live by my own ethical standards.

I do what I preach.

I help all and harm none.

Peace and goodwill surround me.

Buddha And Ananda—The Four Rs: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle And Repair

Young and handsome Ananda become the leader of a monastery when Buddha left his physical body.  The townsmen were skeptical. They felt he was too young and frivolous.

They went in a group and asked him what the old bed sheets were to be used for as the monastery had just been given new ones. Ananda said, ‘I had them cut into towels for the monks.  ‘When those get worn out, what will you do?’  they asked.

           

‘I will fold them, stitch them and use them as doormats for monks coming in from the rain. Still they persisted. ‘What will you do when those too get worn out?’ ‘I will have them cut into strips to use in the kitchen to handle hot vessels.’

‘Why do you take so much trouble over old bed sheets?’ they asked. Ananda reflected for a while, then he said, ‘The life blood of some mother, some human being has been poured into making those sheets. That human effort should be treated with respect,’ he said. The townsmen left satisfied that Buddha had chosen well.

A Yellow Box

Breaking the boundaries and thinking outside the box can have interesting results.

Space is often treated like a closed box. The Japanese poets have always spoken of the skyscape and trees and landscape being part of the living space. Designs should celebrate the sky and trees that surround the space. Consider the concept of stress-free architecture. Old Indian village homes had a pot of water at the entrance to wash ones feet and face. How would it be to walk through water as you enter a house?

The Japanese who have a culture of discipline where one rarely disagrees with an elder, keep punching bags in their offices to combat increasing levels of daily stress and long working hours, I would recommend a stress-busting corner in every working and living space. A place to absorb the earth’s energy by walking barefoot on a safe, springy patch of grass. A central space in skyscrapers, where trees can grow and birds can sing and sunshine can pour into the hearts of concrete jungles. I still remember the circular shape of a hospital in Mangalore, with its gardens and flowing water in the middle. ‘No one can get well, if they cannot see the sky, smell the flowers and hear the flowing water,’ said its chairman.

The Belur Halebid sculptures were originally lit up with sunlight falling on strategically placed mirrors. The mirrors are gone, but, light still falls on these works of sublime art. Mirrors can be used to bring gardens into the space. Homes should celebrate light and air. Sunlight can pour into homes and sleep curled up like a warm puppy on the carpet.

Living spaces should have plenty of touchable, soft, stress-reducing objects and textures.

Monster of Human Being

The monsters of anger, greed and jealousy, shroud the gardens of the mind, poisoning the blood and turning it into a desolate wasteland of disease. Today, so much of our lives are spent in the office. The corporate jungle takes an unimaginable toll on the heart. Nature’s ultimate survival mechanism of fight or flight becomes a chronic response. This is because of the endless deadlines, the deadly competitiveness and the need for a constant state of high alert. One crisis leads to another. The body is constantly awash with the fight and flight response, resulting from a threat to survival.

Such a response is like using an atom bomb to kill an ant —totally inappropriate. But awareness is absent and the body responds as though to annihilation, moment to moment. Due to the modern urge to change jobs rapidly, many executives find themselves in threatening environments surrounded by potential enemies. They have had no time to develop friends or trusted supports. Every day they walk into the modern equivalent of a jungle infested with wild animals and danger. Family support systems are far away. Nuclear families build up explosive pressure due to a revolution of rising expectations, fuelled by the media.