Wednesday 31 October 2018

Network of Affection


Research shows that growing up with more siblings provides you with a chance to have a happier marriage. This may be because of the chance to learn the joy of sharing, caring, comforting others in trouble, adjusting with limited resources and an opportunity for fun, games and common amusements. With the growing trend towards one child families, it is good idea to develop a method of providing a similar experience with children in a building, neighbourhood or circle of friends. The joint family provides a great opportunity for kids to build close relationships with other children and adults. Can we take steps to replace the lost joint family with intimate circles of neighbours and friends? Just today, I was speaking to a friend a busy lawyer about getting together with his neighbours to deal with wet and dry garbage. He said “I don’t even know the 6 other families who live in my building.” A time has come in our own cities and towns, when a person can die next door and no one knows about it. Last week a newspaper article told of a woman in a posh Bangalore suburb whose body was discovered 5 months after she died. Neighbours complained of a foul smell and authorities broke down the door to find her.

Wednesday 24 October 2018

Network of Affection


Research shows that growing up with more siblings provides you with a chance to have a happier marriage. This may be because of the chance to learn the joy of sharing, caring, comforting others in trouble, adjusting with limited resources and an opportunity for fun, games and common amusements. With the growing trend towards one child families, it is good idea to develop a method of providing a similar experience with children in a building, neighbourhood or circle of friends. The joint family provides a great opportunity for kids to build close relationships with other children and adults. Can we take steps to replace the lost joint family with intimate circles of neighbours and friends? Just today, I was speaking to a friend a busy lawyer about getting together with his neighbours to deal with wet and dry garbage. He said “I don’t even know the 6 other families who live in my building.” A time has come in our own cities and towns, when a person can die next door and no one knows about it. Last week a newspaper article told of a woman in a posh Bangalore suburb whose body was discovered 5 months after she died. Neighbours complained of a foul smell and authorities broke down the door to find her.

Tough Times are the Best Times


We live in daunting times to those involved in the blood bath of the financial markets. This must be an impossible time. What are the mantras that can help us keep our equanimity in tough times? I believe that tough times are the best times. The lack of resources forces us to innovate and come up with solutions that are optimally suited to our times. Tough times are good for the planet – there is less waste and more of the 3Rs –reduce, repair and recycle. These are times when you think about refusing things you don’t really need. And realize how much excess baggage you have been carrying. This is a time to reduce clutter of all kinds in your life and bring it to a Zen like perfection. ‘Tough times don’t last, but tough people do,’ said a wag. So this is time for tough love. Get everyone to adapt by processing on improving their skills, instead of complaining. Here are some actions for the tough times.

Thursday 18 October 2018

Tough Times are the Best Times


We live in daunting times to those involved in the blood bath of the financial markets. This must be an impossible time. What are the mantras that can help us keep our equanimity in tough times? I believe that tough times are the best times. The lack of resources forces us to innovate and come up with solutions that are optimally suited to our times. Tough times are good for the planet – there is less waste and more of the 3Rs –reduce, repair and recycle. These are times when you think about refusing things you don’t really need. And realize how much excess baggage you have been carrying. This is a time to reduce clutter of all kinds in your life and bring it to a Zen like perfection. ‘Tough times don’t last, but tough people do,’ said a wag. So this is time for tough love. Get everyone to adapt by processing on improving their skills, instead of complaining. Here are some actions for the tough times.

Monday 8 October 2018

A Healthy and Happy Home


A healthy home should be a healing space, a nurturing positive mind field. It can be a place where all wounds are healed. Alvin Toffler wrote ‘The family is the giant shock absorber of the family to which the bruised and battered individual returns after doing battle with the world!’ If your home is not a sanctuary but a battle-field do something about it. Get help, maybe professional help. Reserve time for laughter and happiness—schedule time for it, like you do for your work. Have a rule to avoid difficult topics during meal times or bed time. Music, if is soothing, can be a powerful force for peace. The very walls absorb the vibrations of the music. Mantras can do the same for your home. I sometimes feel that if music can be infused into the mindspace so that it plays quietly in your mind, as the background to your day, it can have a really soothing affect. Avoid violent, depressing programmes. Just as you would not allow a terrorist into your home, do not allow such movies into the sacred space of your home. You surely are the protector of the field that exists in your home. Make your home fragrant with incense. Clean and sparkling and beautiful. Respectful of the sacred forces that can animate your home.

Thursday 4 October 2018

The Ideal Householder


The ideal householder leads on earth a consecrated life, not unmindful of any duty to the living, or to the departed. His wife, the glory of his house, is modest and frugal, adores her husband, guards herself, and is the guardian of his house’s fame. His children are his choicest treasures; their babbling voices are his music; he feasts with the Gods when he eats the rice their tiny fingers have played with; and his one aim is to make them worthier than himself. Affection is the very life of his soul, of all his virtues the first and greatest. The sum and source of them all is love. His house is open to every guest, whom he welcomes with a smiling face and a pleasant word, and with whom he shares his meal, courteous in speech grateful for every kindness, just in all his dealings, master of himself in perfect self-control, strict in the performance of every assigned duty, pure, patient and forbearing with a heart free from envy, moderate in desires, speaking no evil of others, refraining from unprofitable words, dreading the touch of evil diligent in the discharge of all the duties of his position, and liberal in his benefaction, he is one whom all unite to praise.