Tips to Assess family welfare

Here are some questions which helps you to understand your family welfare.

1. Is your family important to you?

2. Do you spend quality time with members of your family?

3. Would you like to increase the amount of quality time you spend with your family?

4. Does your family include those outside the nuclear family?

5. Is your family linked together through the internet, letters or phone calls?

6. Is respect from your family important to you?

7. Do you show appreciation for things your family has done for you?

8. Do you seek to make your family life different from what it is today?

9. Do you do things to bring about a happier marriage and family life?

10. Do you seek out books and classes that would help you to be a successful parent?

11. Do alcohol and tobacco play a part in your life? Is it a problem?

12. Do you speak up too much or too little in your family?

13. Is there too much fighting in your family?

14. Do you have a bad temper?

15. Does your family do fun things together?

16. Are you considerate in handling of misunderstandings between family members?

17. Do you come from a broken or divorced family?

18. Given the present situation, is there anything you could do to strengthen family ties?

19. Could you possibly use outside help such as counsellors and friends, to assist you in attaining a solid family now or in the future?

a. Good: More than 10 Yeses

b. Adequate: More than 6 Yeses

c. Poor: Less than 5 Yeses

Good out of Bad

Our life provides us with a chance to achieve the highest in ourselves, by using pain as stepping-stones to enlightenment. No one can avoid bad times, but we can ensure that we look at this time as a time for growth and learning. When the mind-numbing pain that immediately follows loss has subsided, we can take proactive steps to provide emergency attention to heal our body, mind and spirit. Pour music into soul. Touch people whom we love. Explore new places. Reach into great books and study alternate futures. Pamper yourself and ask your loved ones for hugs. Meditate. Be silent. Plug into the universe. Let go. Let God catch you. Our sankalpa or intention must be pure. Be clear about the goal. Be non-judgemental. Love and seek to understand with tenderness. Learn and immerse yourself in knowledge. Learn all we can about our chosen field from books, internet, from people, competitors. Remain focused. Never give up. Never, ever!

Traditional Systems

The indigenous health-care system is commensurate with the traditional habits, lifestyle and value systems of a particular culture from where it has evolved.  For example, the Keralites, in spite of coming into contactwith western culture, do not endorse its systems, and hold on to their own traditions. Perhaps that is why their age-old habit of using a high cholesterol diet has not resulted in an increased incidence of heart disease. The indigenous systems of medicine continue to have

a stronghold in Kerala.

All health-care systems, including modern medicine, are in agreement today over the issue that a patient’s psychological state has much to do with the healing process. Minor activities like taking

part in a satsang, singing a tune you enjoy, and dancing for fun to your child’s delight can make you feel contented and allow the good chemicals flow.

Religion

Religion, said the communists contemptuously, is the opiate of the masses. But if religion can calm the mind and slow down the heart and pulse rate, if it can make the engine of life work sturdily and longer, why not adopt it?

Sri Aurobindo writes about a grand spiritual concept of health:

For nearly forty years I believed them when they said I was weakly in constitution, suffered constantly from the smaller and greater ailments and mistook this curse for a burden that Nature had laid upon me. When I renounced the aid of medicines, then they began to depart from me like disappointed parasites. Then only I understood what a mighty force was the natural health within me and how much mightier yet the Will and Faith exceeding mine which God meant to be the divine support of our life in this body…

Negative emotions—anxiety, fear, depression, anger, impatience, hostility, aggressiveness,  over indulgence of any desire—cause imbalance. Moderation leads to harmony.   An integral view of health demands an integral view of life.

To attune the different elements of our nature around this central nucleus is the next step. Without such a reorientation and reorganisation of our life, it will not be possible to establish in ourselves the law of harmony and peace which is so necessary a condition for integral health. 

Your Family Health Assessment

Here are few questions to judge about your family health and by answering these questions, you can analyze your family health conditions and you can improve the health.

Answer Yes (Y) / No (N)

1. Is your family important to you?

2. Do you spend quality time with members of your family?

3. Would you like to increase the amount of quality time you

spend with your family?

4. Does your family include those outside the nuclear family?

5. Is your family linked together through the internet, letters or

phone calls?

6. Is respect from your family important to you?

7. Do you show appreciation for things your family has done for

you?

8. Do you seek to make your family life different from what it is

today?

9. Do you do things to bring about a happier marriage and

family life?

10. Do you seek out books and classes that would help you to be a

successful parent?

Do alcohol and tobacco play a part in your life? Is it a

problem?

12. Do you speak up too much or too little in your family?

13. Is there too much fighting in your family?

14. Do you have a bad temper?

15. Does your family do fun things together?

16. Are you considerate in handling of misunderstandings

between family members?

17. Do you come from a broken or divorced family?

18. Given the present situation, is there anything you could do to

strengthen family ties?

19. Could you possibly use outside help such as counsellors and

friends, to assist you in attaining a solid family now or in the

future?

Score

a. Good: More than 10 Yeses

b. Adequate: More than 6 Yeses

c. Poor: Less than 5 Yeses Score

Taming Water

Water is the giver and taker of life, as we in Chennai know, as the monsoon approaches. Over 2500 years ago Mohenjo-Daro was built in the middle of the Indus valley civilization. Engineers brought water to streets through covered drains and enormous pipelines. Water has many uses: water for transport, for electricity and energy, for chemistry and industrial production, for leisure and recreation, for health and cleaning. All this makes water planning an aspect of development itself.

In 40 AD, Sextus Julius Frontinus observed that the true miracle of Egypt was not the pyramids but its water systems. So too Rome known for its Colosseum and Pantheon, was made possible by its aqueducts and hidden water pipelines.

It is working with water that has made human civilization possible. In the desert of Africa, in Libiya, engineers have found a hidden underground pool the size of Germany. They started working on piping it to where most of their people live, on the shores of the Mediterranean. This is called The Great Man Made River project, which is expected to be as long as the Rhine. It will eventually cover 3,380kilometers. Where did this water come from? Ten thousand years ago, the Sahara was a green savannah with animals like giraffes and elephants. This is the hidden ground water stored from those distant times, under the desert sand. The quadruple aged water aquifers that were uncovered in the 50s had projected sizes varying from 4,500 to 20,000 cubic kilometers. The majority of this water supply was accumulated almost 15,000 to 25,000 years ago, while some water tanks are believed to be a few thousand years old. It was bombed by Nato and nearly 50% of the people had no running water. Today it has been repaired.

The growing water scarcity of the North China plains and the sinking groundwater table that threatens the very existence of Beijing as a capital, have led them to revive a gigantic plan, first suggested by Mao Zedong in 1952. The project will take 5 per cent of the Yangtze’s flow and pump it hundreds of kilometres to the water-thirsty cities and farmlands of the north – as far as Inner Mongolia.

Man has built 45,000 dams over 15 meters high. Over 4, 00,000 sq. kilometres are flooded by this dammed water. Water rich countries like Iceland was working on entering the hydro age when everything from cars to factories will be driven by water. More than 2000 years ago, Pausanias, the Greek Geographer, declared that no city can call itself one, unless it has an ornamental fountain! Man has tried so hard to control water. But water effortlessly takes back control!

Nurturing the Workplace

 Gandhiji knew it when he filled the streets with people singing Vande Mataram. A national anthem celebrates nationhood, the blood, sweat andtears of creating a country. It aims to transcend logic and unleash the tigers of passion. The Americans stand there, hand on heart, before their flag and sing the Stars and Stripes. It creates a wave of national pride and primes people for leadership. The Japanese use this same force to create love for the company they work in. Vivekananda carried the message of India to the world with his matchless talk which starts, “Arise, Awake, stop not till the goal is reached”!

Words absorb and radiate power because of their meaning and usage. Gandhiji created a few words, “bullets” of truth that turned a large passive lake of humanity into a tsunami, which forced the British to leave India. They were:

• Quit India!

• Do or Die!

• Purna Swaraj! (Total freedom)

• Vande Mataram!

• Jai Hind!

• Be Indian, Buy Indian!

• Swadeshi!

• Satyameve Jayathe!

Mantras or brief prayer-words were created by ancient seers to enter the heart and regenerate the awareness of the soul.’ When you infuse a sense of pride and joy in what you do, it becomes a joyful experience, instead of a chore. To work at something you love, to be “self-actualised”, in Maslow’s terms, is to protect yourself against dying young.’ ‘People can be very happy if they love their work.

Secrets to Increase Family Bonding

Every day, at an appointed hour, sit peacefully with your eyes closed and breathe. Then repeat the following affirmations.

 I have a safe and happy home.

 I enjoy unconditional love.

 The food I eat and the water I drink here nourishes me.

 God blesses us and keeps our children safe.

 This home is a sanctuary and a refuge.

 All conflicts can be solved.

Create Positive Field to have a Ideal Home

Fill your home with affirmations, positive strokes, a peaceful atmosphere and a nurturing space that enhances prana. Make it sparkling clean, fragrant with incense and flowers, and beautiful. Be respectful of the sacred forces that can animate it.

Avoid violent, depressing television programmes. Just as you would not allow a terrorist into your home, do not allow them into the blessed space of your home. Surely you are the protector of the field that exists in your home.

A healthy home is a healing space, a nurturing positive mind-field. It can be a place where all wounds are healed. If your home is not a sanctuary, but a battle-field, do something about it. Get help, maybe professional help. Family dynamics can cause disease or reverse it.

Reserve time for laughter and happiness—schedule time for it, like you do for your work. Laughter, smiles, compliments and hugs create a powerful positive field in the home.

Involve in Happiness Creating Activities

• Singing together.

• Thanking your gurus.

• Being loving and giving affirmations to parents and elders.

• Forgiving those who harmed you in your life—let go.

• Calling forth the highest from others.

• Thinking of God, the source of all abundance.

• Celebrating Abundance. Praising God.

Tips to be healthy

•    Take care of your health. You cannot deliver a prize-winning performance with a broken-down body.

• Force the world to look at issues like: What kind of world are we leaving for our children? Where have leisure, poetry and caring been banished? Why has the door been shut on the smiles and joy of our children? Why do we have no time for our friends or small acts of kindness? Why are deadlines so terrible that they extract death as the price? None of us would mind dying for great causes, but to diefor a power-point presentation, seems slightly frivolous.

• Do not get stereotyped into how others see your role: as a mother or an all forgiving rescuer in the workplace. Encourage men to discover their so-called feminine qualities of sensitivity and caring. Do not

stereotype men!

• Affirm women who are role models instead of trying to find chinks in their armour. Network with them. There is a queen-bee complex, which causes successful women managers to surround themselves

with male managers and discourage the entry of women. Identify this and speak up when required.

• There are points in a woman’s life-cycle when her intensive physical presence is needed. There are high priority interactions which cannot be delegated. Build a support system with family, household staff, neighbours and friends to help you enjoy these times. Men too have been deprived of active participation in these peak experiences in the past. Make your company recognise and

respond to these realities.

• Hitch your wagon to the pursuit of daily and consistent learning. Be Saraswati. Bring your heritage of creating wholeness from leftovers, and wealth from waste. Be Lakshmi. Call forth the courage to speak, write and act for what is true and good for all. Be Shakti. Be all woman. Be all human. Celebrate the fact that you a woman.

Happiness Mantras to Improve our Wellness

*  The world is like a buffet counter at a five-star hotel. Let’s not grab everything on our plates. Let us be choosy, so that we may avoid spiritual indigestion and physical exhaustion.

*  Let us replace stress with positive emotions that engender joy. Let us increase our HQ.

*  ‘I felt like a waterfall,’ said Diane Roffe-Stainrotter, gold-medallist skier in the 1994 Winter Olympics. The joy of a job perfectly executed, fills the body with the chemicals of bliss.

*  Professor Mihalyi Csikzent speaks about a state called the flow, which athletes, musicians, surgeons—in fact everyone—experiences when they are at their best. It is the experience of doing your job with

*  total immersion in it. So absorbed are you, that there is no place for anxiety or niggling worries.

*  Finding a job you love is one of the ways you can immunise yourself against heart problems.

*  A good marriage is a protective shield against heart attacks.

Ardhanareeshwara Model

The new millennium is a time for growth and promise for women. It is time for them to emerging from the stereotypical role of how others see them: as a mother or an all forgiving rescuer in the workplace. Men too are replacing their conventional roles as the bread-winner or boss with the ‘Complete Man’ image, where it is permissible for them to cuddle babies and shed tears, and discover their so-called

feminine qualities of sensitivity and caring. The sharp man/woman divide, the Mars/Venus chasm has been miraculously bridged by the challenge of the times. It is a time to build partnerships and collaboration. To be ‘ardhanareeshwara’ is the challenge all human beings face today. This is why the ratio of men to women in the IT industry begins to approach that magical figure of perfect collaboration, fifty-fifty.

contentment is happiness

Dr Dean Ornish, MD, the founder and president of the nonprofit Preventive Medicine Research Institute in California, and author of six best-selling books, says that men who feel that their wives love them are much more likely to reverse heart disease than those who feel the opposite. The home can be the cause for disease. It can also be the safe sanctuary for healing and reversal of disease. Everyone talks of quality time nowadays. Once, a girl from Kuala Lumpur told me about her exciting marriage to a man from LA. ‘We have a really good time on holidays,’ she said. Another bright young yuppie from a major bank said her husband worked for the same bank in another city. ‘We meet on weekends and feel just like we did when we were dating!’ she said her eyes shining. Is this looked forward-to weekend the alternative to the solid permanence and possible boredom of a traditional marriage? Are the constant travels away from each other the basis for the ‘open birdcage’ marriage to which the bird always returns from its travels? Today, when we look back, we believe that contentment is happiness