Beware of Happiness Traps

• Expecting too much from others.

• Not accepting yourself as you are; demanding too much of yourself.

• Not being content with anything.

• Feeling you are not contributing.

• Feeling excluded.

• Playing politics and being manipulative.

• Feeling you cannot prevent another’s suffering.

• Constantly craving for food.

• In a rush all the time.

• Excessively or often angry.

• Full of lethargy and inactivity.

• Having too much tiredness.

• Ignoring others

Principles of Happy Life

1. Exercise every day.

2. Make friends with a doctor, preferably a young doctor.

3. Love myself (this is a tough one).

4. Give more affirmations, go slow on discounts.

5. Keep in touch with friends.

6. Play more.

7. Cultivate flow activities.

8. Spend more fun time with family.

9. Spend uncluttered time and do interesting things with the kids.

10. Do something new every day.

11. Be a participant in life, not a spectator.

Celebrating Summer

Summer is waiting, crouching in the shadows to leap upon us with an orange roar of colour, heat and sweat. In the drama of the four seasons, summer is the brightest. The Kashmir valley celebrates the Tulip festival in April at Siraj Bagh, clasped in embrace of the scenic Zabrawan range, in Srinagar. Nearly 60 varieties of beautiful Tulips worship the sun in over 5 hectares of land.

Imagine a living carpet caressed by the cool summer breeze, woven by the great Architect of the Universe Himself! It is a changing kaleidoscope of red, yellow, variegated pink, white, orange, light blue and magenta. The Kashmiris celebrate this event by displaying their handicrafts and cultural programs. Authentic Kashmiri cuisine is part of the festival. After last week’s events, I wonder whether blood is good for the Tulips to grow? Vibrant life and the tragic death of beautiful young people lie so closely woven together, here.

Summer too is like that, let us decide to enjoy the joy and vibrancy of the season and push the discomfort to the back of our minds. Welcome and celebrate the summer. Plant the colourful, short lived summer flowers. Float them in water, in artistic mud, wide mouthed, pots.

Celebrate summer in the evening breezes in flower strewn gardens and lazy beaches. Celebrate with raw mango juice and lime sherbet. This is the season for a luxury bath – set apart time for your tryst with cool water sprays in the pool and in the bath. Emperor Akbar had to get his ice from the Himalayan glaciers on elephant back. We just need to keep the fridge well stocked. Wear a cool attitude and retreat to cool air conditioned spaces at noon, instead of testing your tolerance with outdoor tasks.

Create a water spot for people who walk past your house. Fill the bird baths and set out water for the squirrels. Happy summer holidays!

To Be Cheerful and Happy

Enjoy the sweetness of everyday things. Focus on happiness. We should plant a garden of happiness, by welcoming the positive emotions into our lives—love, compassion, wonder, courage, laughter and peace. Let the cells of your body be gently bathed in happiness, positive thoughts and healing energies. To stand in wonder before the splendour of God’s creation is to be rejuvenated. The body and bloodstream are bathed in endorphins and serotonins which are Nature’s tranquillisers.’ ‘Physical fitness is of utmost importance as it is the starting point for wellness and happiness of the mind and spirit.

Being Happy is Your Responsibility

‘You have to take responsibility for the changes,’

1. Exercise every day.

2. Make friends with a doctor, preferably a young doctor.

3. Love myself (this is a tough one).

4. Give more affirmations, go slow on discounts.

5. Keep in touch with friends.

6. Play more.

7. Cultivate flow activities.

8. Spend more fun time with family

9. Spend uncluttered time and do interesting things with the kids.

10. Do something new every day.

11. Be a participant in life, not a spectator.

Dharmic Living

Dharma is the law of right living. Unless you live by your own internal standards you can never be happy. When you bend the rules you reduce your chances for true, pure happiness. ‘Flexibility is bending rules without breaking them’, proclaims a smart hoarding, showing a gymnast’s impossible stretch. It all depends on what your internal monitor will allow.

To understand your Dharmic standards, assess yourself by answering to the following questions:

1. Do you judge the moral standards of others?

2. Do you feel any responsibility for the poor, crippled or sick?

3. Are your standards based on what your family practices?

4. Have you made your own decisions about what is honest and right?

5. Are honesty and integrity important to you in your family, with business partners and friends?

6. Do you ever gossip?

7. Do you have a role in seeing that others are protected against unfairness or injustice?

8. Are you concerned with the quality of your family's life?

9. Do you treat others as you want to be treated?

10. Have you fought against injustice to others?

To achieve excellence in the corporate world and still be happy

The Indian tradition shows us that positive, radiant happiness is our birthright. The Happiness quotient (HQ) is a concept that measures approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved in his life. The HQ starts by the creation of a positive mindspace, one that nurtures the positive emotions that increase happiness. It is also required to understand the impact of negative fields and how to avoid them.

Events are not under our control, but our perceptions and reactions to them are. Life’s greatest prize – Happiness. Here are some Happiness Mantras:

Happiness Mantras

Happiness Mantra 1: Each new day holds out a chance to create a whole new beginning, a sparkling new field of possibilities.

Happiness Mantra 2: The ecology, the geography of your inner mindspace, is in your hands.

Happiness Mantra 3: 'Swayambhu' is a word that describes happiness welling out of you, like an underground stream in the mountains.

Happiness Mantra 4: Focus on Stress and unhappiness should be turned upside down. Instead of attacking unhappiness, we should plant a garden of happiness, by welcoming the positive emotions into our lives - love, compassion, wonder, courage, laughter and peace.

Happiness Mantra 5: Focusing on our unhappiness by attacking it only helps to magnetize more power and attention to the negative person, event or object that causes it. Hence focus on cultivating happy people and avoid toxic people.

Happiness Mantra 6: When the garden is clean and blooming and full of life, the snakes of anger have no place to hide; the thorns of greed get cleared away. When the clutter of old hatreds is replaced by order, the flowers of friendship bloom. The scorpions of revenge and jealousy slither away and the butterflies of laughter return to celebrate the flowers.

Happiness Mantra 7:  Too much television is ‘Tele-visham’ – (Tele poison). Too much stimulation, a mindspace crowded by fantasy people and events, distracts you from focusing on your own mindspace, your home, your backyard.

Happiness Mantra 8:  Some days we seem to live a fantasy life dominated by day dreams, while reality tugs at our heartstrings for attention, like a neglected child. Take care of what is yours and enjoy it.

Happiness Mantra 9:  Let the cells of your body be gently bathed in happiness, positive thoughts and healing energies.

Happiness Mantra 10: ‘Physical fitness is the most important thing in life. The capacity to attain perfection of mind and soul depends on your physical health. Take care of yourself as no one else can do it for you.’