Being Happy is Your Responsibility

‘You have to take responsibility for the changes,’

1. Exercise every day.

2. Make friends with a doctor, preferably a young doctor.

3. Love myself (this is a tough one).

4. Give more affirmations, go slow on discounts.

5. Keep in touch with friends.

6. Play more.

7. Cultivate flow activities.

8. Spend more fun time with family

9. Spend uncluttered time and do interesting things with the kids.

10. Do something new every day.

11. Be a participant in life, not a spectator.

Dharmic Living

Dharma is the law of right living. Unless you live by your own internal standards you can never be happy. When you bend the rules you reduce your chances for true, pure happiness. ‘Flexibility is bending rules without breaking them’, proclaims a smart hoarding, showing a gymnast’s impossible stretch. It all depends on what your internal monitor will allow.

To understand your Dharmic standards, assess yourself by answering to the following questions:

1. Do you judge the moral standards of others?

2. Do you feel any responsibility for the poor, crippled or sick?

3. Are your standards based on what your family practices?

4. Have you made your own decisions about what is honest and right?

5. Are honesty and integrity important to you in your family, with business partners and friends?

6. Do you ever gossip?

7. Do you have a role in seeing that others are protected against unfairness or injustice?

8. Are you concerned with the quality of your family's life?

9. Do you treat others as you want to be treated?

10. Have you fought against injustice to others?

To achieve excellence in the corporate world and still be happy

The Indian tradition shows us that positive, radiant happiness is our birthright. The Happiness quotient (HQ) is a concept that measures approximately, the measure of happiness each person has achieved in his life. The HQ starts by the creation of a positive mindspace, one that nurtures the positive emotions that increase happiness. It is also required to understand the impact of negative fields and how to avoid them.

Events are not under our control, but our perceptions and reactions to them are. Life’s greatest prize – Happiness. Here are some Happiness Mantras:

Happiness Mantras

Happiness Mantra 1: Each new day holds out a chance to create a whole new beginning, a sparkling new field of possibilities.

Happiness Mantra 2: The ecology, the geography of your inner mindspace, is in your hands.

Happiness Mantra 3: 'Swayambhu' is a word that describes happiness welling out of you, like an underground stream in the mountains.

Happiness Mantra 4: Focus on Stress and unhappiness should be turned upside down. Instead of attacking unhappiness, we should plant a garden of happiness, by welcoming the positive emotions into our lives - love, compassion, wonder, courage, laughter and peace.

Happiness Mantra 5: Focusing on our unhappiness by attacking it only helps to magnetize more power and attention to the negative person, event or object that causes it. Hence focus on cultivating happy people and avoid toxic people.

Happiness Mantra 6: When the garden is clean and blooming and full of life, the snakes of anger have no place to hide; the thorns of greed get cleared away. When the clutter of old hatreds is replaced by order, the flowers of friendship bloom. The scorpions of revenge and jealousy slither away and the butterflies of laughter return to celebrate the flowers.

Happiness Mantra 7:  Too much television is ‘Tele-visham’ – (Tele poison). Too much stimulation, a mindspace crowded by fantasy people and events, distracts you from focusing on your own mindspace, your home, your backyard.

Happiness Mantra 8:  Some days we seem to live a fantasy life dominated by day dreams, while reality tugs at our heartstrings for attention, like a neglected child. Take care of what is yours and enjoy it.

Happiness Mantra 9:  Let the cells of your body be gently bathed in happiness, positive thoughts and healing energies.

Happiness Mantra 10: ‘Physical fitness is the most important thing in life. The capacity to attain perfection of mind and soul depends on your physical health. Take care of yourself as no one else can do it for you.’

Listen to Your Body

Physical transformation is possible, if like the ancient yogis, we follow the actions of young animals. The mountain pose in the suryanamaskar is derived from the back stretch of the dog. Watch the young dog. It is always in movement and bouncing and stretching. Make physical movement a part of your daily life. As the salesmen say ‘Cover territory instead of covering your chair’. ‘Use it or lose it’ said Jane Fonda. Violent physical exercise once a week is no use, if you’re just vegetating for the rest of the week in front of the TV or computer. Listen more and bark less, use non verbal actions to show unconditional affection to family and friends.

Listen to your body. If you are tired, rest. If you are hungry, eat. If you are lonely, communicate, ask for a hug. If you are angry, deal with your anger constructively, resolve it. The body is our vehicle for the journey of our soul in this world. You may be an immortal soul who happens to own a body, but the body-vehicle has to be maintained in good condition, so that we may achieve the goals for which we were created.

Life is the Guru

In India, the teacher is called a ‘guru’ – he who eliminates the darkness. So this means that whoever teaches, is a guru. There are gurus for every discipline and skill. Since 1962, on September 5^th, India celebrates Teachers day. On that day, the birthday of Sarvapalli  Radhakrishnan, children give their teachers gifts and are even allowed to teach the class, while teachers listen.

We know that learning can be had from various sources. Not only from books and teachers in classrooms but also from the experience of life itself. The best teacher is the one who suggests rather than dogmatizes, and inspires his listener with the wish to teach himself. All of us long for a teacher who gives you something to think about besides home work.

Uddhava is said to have asked his friend Krishna, “Who is a guru?” Krishna points at an eagle in the sky and explains, “That eagle soaring in sky can swoop down to earth in a single instant and pick up its prey.  As far as vision is concerned, that eagle is your guru. Look at the lion in the jungle, how splendid is its gait. As far as physical grace is concerned, that lion is your guru. Those who love you, teach you. Those who hate you, teach you more. Victory is a teacher but failure is a far greater teacher. Everything, every event in your life is sent to teach you. Whether you learn from the great classroom of life, depends on you.”

From teachers we not only learn subjects but also lessons on how to live. We watch our teachers and learn life’s lesson from them: compassion, dignity, courage. A good teacher is like a candle – it consumes itself to light the way for others. “The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called truth," says Dan Rather. Over 100 countries celebrate Teacher’s day once a year. In war torn Afghanistan, students honour their teachers with special food, cookies, music and presents.

Any day is a good day to  write a love letter to all your favourite teachers, including your first teachers – your parents.

“If you want happiness for an hour -- take a nap. If you want happiness for a day -- go fishing. If you want happiness for a month -- get married. If you want happiness for a year -- inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime -- help someone else,” Chinese Proverb

The Season of Hope

Easter Sunday celebrates the themes of hope, regeneration, resurrection and the possibility of eternal life. The day is a joyous one, celebrated with a feast of Easter eggs, coloured red, hearty meals, games and family reunions. The Russian princesses exchanged golden jeweled eggs made by the fabled jeweller Faberge. This day follows 40 days of the Lenten fast.

On a personal level, it reminds us of the cycle of time which moves inexorably from fasting to feasting, from sorrow to happiness, from defeat to victory, from darkness to light and death to eternal life. It is a reminder that neither good times nor bad are permanent. As the Bible puts it, “This too shall pass”.

We can take the Easter message to heart as we dive into a new financial year on 1^st April. Here are some of the lessons:

1. 1.       Everything changes
2. 2.       The kalachakra or wheel of life takes one through the ups and downs of life. Neither lasts. Both are temporary.
3. 3.       Have faith that good things are waiting round the corner. Meanwhile, work hard and hope.
4. 4.       Celebrate the dawn of hope and move forward.
5. 5.       Transformation is awaiting you if you are willing to allow your old self to die. Just like a seed transforms from being a seed, to become a plant and a mighty tree.

So, roll up your sleeves, close your personal and corporate accounts as the March 31^st deadline approaches. Pay creditors. Make up with those with whom you have had conflicts. Reach out to enemies, if any. Thank God for the blessings of the previous year. Get ready for a brand new future – the season of Hope!

See how skillfully March 31^st avoids major holidays like Christmas and New Year. Notice how it takes into account the unpredictable outcome of the February-March crop. Celebrate the past; clear the decks for a bright and prosperous, financial year ahead.

Give Yourself a Hug

Soon you will be looking at March, 31^st the time of financial reckoning and feeling completely drained and knocked out. You are overworked and exhausted and you don’t like the person you see in the mirror. Your doctor does not like the person he sees in your medical reports.

Now turn inward and start a personal affirmation account for yourself.  Give yourself a big hug for being the most hard working, kind and special person in your life. Invest in a note book which will document your love affair with yourself.

v  Write a love letter to yourself. Recognize your unique beauty, your capacity to do your best and all the gifts that make you such a fabulous person. “Love yourself first and everything else falls into place,” said Lucille Ball.

v  Start a gratefulness dairy where you record all the things you are grateful for. Thank God for His blessings.

v  ‘I can,’ is a hundred times more important that IQ. Celebrate your smallest successes. Stop that nagging, critical voice in your head that keeps picking on you. Speak to yourself kindly and lovingly.

v  Stop worrying. The way to be happy is to stop worrying about things which cannot be changed.

v  Plug into the Source of all power, through prayer and meditation and acknowledge that you are a child of God, made in his own image.

v  Explore, dream, discover: at the end of your life do not regret all the dreams you have failed to pursue.

Take care of your body. It is the only home you have: nourish it, nurture it, exercise it. Make friends with a young physician. Focus on it, love it! Have fun! Because as Oscar Wilde said, “To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.”