Life –Ultimate Class Room

We have so much waiting for us. Each of us comes into the world with a need to learn many things. Life is the ultimate classroom. Each of us has different problems to solve, tests to pass. Events will swirl around us uncontrolled, regardless. Our response is something we can control. Choose to say beautiful words, to hear lovely words. Banish harsh, angry and foul language from the inner spaces of your heart. Perhaps you could set a song for the day in my mind. Those who met us would see the sparkle of that song in our eyes and feel the rhythm of its harmony in my limbs.

Life –Ultimate Class Room

We have so much waiting for us. Each of us comes into the world with a need to learn many things. Life is the ultimate classroom. Each of us has different problems to solve, tests to pass. Events will swirl around us uncontrolled, regardless. Our response is something we can control. Choose to say beautiful words, to hear lovely words. Banish harsh, angry and foul language from the inner spaces of your heart. Perhaps you could set a song for the day in my mind. Those who met us would see the sparkle of that song in our eyes and feel the rhythm of its harmony in my limbs.

Social Bonding

No man is an island, but a part of the Main,’ said the pensive poet John Donne. Man is a social being, and interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand other people. It is to be able to see what motivates them, how they work and how to work cooperatively with them. Interpersonal intelligence is the inward sense of being able to understand oneself, to form an accurate model of oneself and to operate that model effectively to live life. Professor Howard Gardner of the Harvard School of Psychology told me that the two aspects of personal intelligence, interpersonal and intrapersonal, form the most important foundation for a happy, fulfilling life. To those who define success as happiness, these two elements can be the bedrock of a happy life. Sensitive people can empathize with others. They can understand the feelings of others as though they were feeling it themselves. This skill involves being able to pick up subtle verbal, tonal and non–verbal signals from others. Charismatic leaders are able to reach others by breaking the barrier that exists between people. A charismatic speaker can make thousands of people react like one mind. The Upanishads say that the divine spark or life force exists in all—the leader, the leper, the judge and the criminal. The concept of a life force is recognised in all cultures. It is called Chi by the Chinese; Light, or Holy Ghost, by Christians; Prana by the Hindus; Mana by the Kahunas and; Bioplasmic Energy by Russians researchers.

Protecting the Ocean

On the 28th January 2017 two oil cargo ships collided off the Ennore Coast near Chennai, India and poured tonnes of oil into the ocean. The waves and the southern current carried it 34 kms up to Vettuvankeni in the South. What was great, was that a large number of students and volunteers joined the official clean up operations. Sadly, the sludge was being removed in buckets. The volunteers often suffered burns with no proper safety equipment or clothing. But the spirit was commendable. Over 70 tonnes of heavy black sludge was removed from the ocean. Considering that when MT BW Maple and MT Dawn Kanchipuram, collided one of the ships carried 32813 tonnes of oil, we in Chennai, were lucky. Health camps were conducted to provide treatment to those involved in cleaning operations. Over 60 doctors stood by to treat breathlessness and skin ailments. Nineteen helicopter sorties to spray oil dispersant chemical were undertaken. Sale of fish dropped 50% due to fears about pollution. In Indian ports, only 50% of pollution response equipment is funded by the centre. The training and acquisition of equipment to handle such accidents appears inadequate. The sludge mixed with sand has affected our world famous beaches. The ecological challenge is obvious. Dead turtles are being washed up. Fish eggs and eggs of other marine creatures are sure to be damaged. Birds that eat the dead creatures will surely be affected as will the people. Of course this is insignificant when compared to the Gulf Oil spill from Discoverer Enterprise. It is still the largest accidental spill in world history. It resulted from a blow out in a BP oil rig. Oil flowed at the rate of 25 million gallons of oil a day for 87 days! 3.19 million barrels of oil leaked out. It damaged 57 miles of Gulf shore line and the birds and marine life destroyed cannot be estimated. Experts say this could have devastated the coast for years to come. Deep sea corals which live for centuries were damaged and eco system deep in the ocean were destroyed. The oil dispersant caused some more damage. Pelicans were covered with black oil. Fish floated belly up. Over 200 dolphins died that year and for at least 9 years afterwards. Kemp’s ridley sea turtles nests became far less. Small sea birds could not fly and dive for food with their wings encrusted with oil. Shrimp fisheries were closed for the year. Heart defects were noticed in the larvae of blue tuna fish. Deformed wildlife was found. The ocean belongs to mankind. It is our earth’s lung and needs to be protected. The smallest country can affect the largest in this arena. So let us save our oceans.

Learn to Deal with Others and their Feelings

A drug addict once explained the difference between sympathy and empathy. He said, ‘You can never feel anything but sympathy for me and what I need is empathy.’ The he said, ‘Empathy is the capacity to feel my pain in your heart.’ To be ‘socially tone deaf’ * can lead to a life littered with broken relationships. Develop the capacity to pick up subtle verbal, tonal and non-verbal signals from others. Learn also the ability to send out soothing, nurturing signals to others, thus creating a positive interpersonal field. Unlike in a magnetic field, where positive attracts negative and vice versa, a positive, emotional and spiritual field, attracts positive people and events and, in addition, transforms even a normally negative person into a positive one. ‘How can I develop this skill?’ I ask. ‘Practice working with people and listening to them with the same attitude as you would towards a beloved child, or respected parent. Your word, tone, your very glance should be completely focused on the person. Don’t dilute the interaction by playing with your Blackberry, talking on your cellphone or fiddling with your laptop. When you are with someone, pay complete attention. Anything less will only elicit a lukewarm response. Those who can create positive fields around themselves attract and build lifetime relationships.’

Nurturing work place

Many of us spend most of our time at work. If we do not enjoy our work, if we feel overwhelmed by it, it will surely damage us. The constant pressure of negative emotions causes inescapable damage to our arteries and other delicate tissues. It also slows down the body’s capacity to repair this damage. To work at something you love, to be ‘self-actualized’ in Maslow’s terms, is to protect yourself against dying young. As Khalil Gibran wrote, ‘What is it to work with love?... It is to weave the cloth from the strings of your heart, as though your beloved were to wear it.’ Politics can make the blood boil with suppressed rage and unexpressed anxiety. ‘Fast tracking,’ being a corporate star, will extract the inevitable price of damage to arteries if you are not ‘mindful’, if you are not aware of the impact of everything you do on your system. Reisman speaks of the ‘lonely crowd’. Loneliness, a sense of exclusion, is a poison that can cause illness as easily as a virus or bacteria. Loneliness is the most lethal of modern diseases. For example, newly widowed women have a higher rate of breast cancer than married or single women.

Welcome joy into your space

Those who read are happier, as are those who play a game. This year take proactive steps to increase happiness in the here and now. Seek out new experiences and adventures. Studies show that even planning to go for a comedy movie increases one’s levels of happiness. Even if you make a booking for a new adventure, your mood shifts to a more positive level. Those who read are happier, as are those who play a game. Families who play together find themselves in an improved mood. Tai Chi or swimming help replace brain cells lost due to stress. It is believed that gardeners are happier than those who live in sterile surroundings and have nothing to do with the Earth. Being in the midst of nature for 20 minutes has a positive effect on one’s well-being. A pet, undoubtedly, contributes to wellness. There are many easy steps you can take to welcome joy into your space: • Get Sun in the mornings or late afternoons for a shot of instant well-being. • Dress up and look your best every day. • Smell flowers or spray a floral scent all around your home. A citrus scent is believed to banish depression. • ‘The Lipstick effect’ works well for women. • Painting rooms in sky blue shades is believed to ushers in a sense of calm. • Food has for centuries been the way to heartfelt happiness. Walnuts, apricots, mushrooms, dark chocolate increases contentedness and caffeine increases dopamine transmission. Seafood, meat, and nuts provide zinc and can lift your mood. • Being grateful for all that you have. Buy gifts for others. Shut off from social media. This year you get out of your auto-pilot mode and rise up. The writer is the author of Everyday Happiness Mantras and Innovation Sutra.